Tag Archives: Muslim women

Conversations with an Afghan Man

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This was written in an email on 2006 to family and friends

‘The most fearsome of warriors turned out to be by far the most peaceful of people’

From the balcony, and far into the skies,  I spot a blur vision of the moon, almost matched to perfection. All activities have ended. Kabul is as silent as a graveyard. Not far, I vaguely see the picturesque scene of Afghan mountain peaks silhouetted against the hazy sky. The sun is setting, leaves are rustling and not long more the call for prayer will sound. I prepare myself for prayer and sit by the balcony door in a lotus position. My eyes close as I try to achieve a oneness with God. ‘God is Great. There is no God but God himself’, the prayer recites.

After my prayer, I skip down the stairs and rush ouside to speak to the guardsman, an ex-commander in the army during Soviet occupation, whom I call ‘Ustaz’ (teacher). He pulls out a chair for me and places it next to him. I am eager to hear him. He tells me about God, about spirituality. I ask him about women’s modesty (the Burqua, Hejab, Jilbab). He pauses for a moment then replies ‘God knows no beings. To him, we look the same. The only thing that differs is our hearts.’ It reminds me of a saying by an Islamic Sufi poet, Rumi, ‘When we are dead, seek not our tomb in the Earth, but find it in the hearts of men.’ My Ustaz moves on to women’s education. I lean closer forward and listen intently. He speaks in a different language but the message is clear. ‘If my wife is not educated, how will my children ever be educated, for all the knowledge of a man is first imparted to him by his mother when he was child.’ He repeats for the 3rd time- the views of the Taliban are not representative of us. Both men and women suffered the loss of education. He himself had to burn his books when the Taliban raided his village. ‘When we threw our books away, it was like we threw our lives away.’

I am drawn to my Ustaz’s words. I learn more and more each day i spend my evenings with him. I hear his speak of his wife as if she were a sacred shrine. He tells me she is too precious for him to raise his voice at her. He then quotes a phrase from the Holy Koran,’God created a man and a woman so that love could grow between them.’ Such a beautiful phrase establishing the sacredness of love. I ask myself silently, ‘Will anyone believe this was cited by an Afghan man?’

I tell him of my plans to raise awareness of women’s rights within an Islamic framework in villages. But I also tell him I am afraid it will create an uproar. First he points to the heavens. I know I have to believe it is possible. He places his hand on his chest, ’But whenever you need me, I will be there for you.’

On my thoughts about the future of women- I see such a huge potential, albeit slowly for a progression and development of women’s rights.There are some men who had views like women should stay at home and not go out…or that men have the right to marry four women etc. Their reasoning however differs; some pointed out that the security of Afghan streets is so loose and there is no protection from the law if anything were to happen to their women and therfore women should not be allowed to go out. Others had the impression that ‘It is my job as a man to support my family. I don’t want my wife to bear that burden‘. Others were outright male chauvinists (excuse me fofr using such a term!) What I tried to emphasise was though I understoodtheir concerns, it was wrong for them to limit their women from having the choices and making their own decisions. I spoke to them everything from marriage, veil, education, polygamy. I had my koran with me and actually pointed out the relevant phrases and quoted what the Prophet said. I also made the driver (who speaks English) to interpret everything for me. For me, raising awareness was very important and I tried as best I can to convey the truth to as many men as I could gather.

A common one was about polygamy and I showed them in the Koran a phrase in the Koran first that says

And if you fear that you cannot act equitably towards orphans, then marry such women as seem good to you, two and three and four; but if you fear that you will not do justice (between them), then (marry) only one or what your right hands possess; this is more proper, that you may not deviate from the right course 4;3

Then later it states:
‘You may never be able to deal justly with you wives even if it is your ardent desire, so leave not them hanging as if in the air; and if you effect a reconciliation and guard (against evil), then surely Allah is Forgiving, Merciful 4;129

When I told them this, I felt like they understood. Only 2 questioned further and argued with me but most of them accepted this and told that my ‘mind was good’ as they put it. But also warned me that some men could kill me for this and I should becareful. But the mere fact that they sat to listen to me, an 18yr old non-Afghan ramble on about something so controversial and even agreed and said they understood finally shows how moderate they are and how much potential there is to raise awareness and raise ACCEPTANCE of women’s rights within an Islamic framework. THIS IS WHAT I WANT TO FULFILL desperately.

A Tribute to Afghan Women

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This was written in 2005 in an email to family and friends

This is about women of Afghanistan and their struggle

Reading about the struggle for peace and freedom by the women of Afghanistan will probably bring you to tears. To see it in reality, is, on the other hand, extremely inspiring. Afghanistan has been a victim of over 25 years of continuous civil war and 8 years of immense oppression under the Taliban, where women were subjected to laws, under a religious disguise, which completely disregarded their worth and dignity as a human being. Some women I spoke to recounted stories of being beaten in public for showing merely their ankles’. There was another story of a woman who allegedly murdered her husband and was arranged to be executed in a football stadium. The boy who cleaned up later recounted that as she fell onto the ground in religious supplication for mercy, a bullet shot through her head, with her brains splattering all around her.

Afghan Women

My experiences with Afghan women also showed me the true strength and determination of a woman. To be hidden behind a veil covering everything but a net of holes for them to see through is one thing. Being subjected to ridiculous rules by the Ministry of Vice and Virtue was another.

Though the Taliban had been ousted out of power in 2001, many women still wear the burqua (veil) because they feel insecure in the streets. Some of them even told me that the burqua has become part of the Afghan culture. I did try wearing the burqua but could not even last for more than an hour. I practically felt like a ghost- to everyone else, I was completely inexistent. I was just a blue figure without a face, without a character and without life. How did they live in a world where they did not actually ‘live’ and when they tried to, every gesture, every sway, every smile and every noise was regulated by the government? It was like being a prisoner in your home.

Yet beneath the burqua weren’t despaired, agonized and lifeless women. They had ambitions, dreams and hopes for their futures. And every single one of them wanted to play a part in the rebuilding of their country. I never thought I would ever see a feminist movement in my life, less a peaceful one! Even the little girl, Sunbol whom I am sponsoring, aged 11, displayed such a strong ambitions to become a ‘kidney doctor’ (she is an orphan and suffering from kidney failure). Other young children I spoke to in schools listed out a string of things they wanted to do for their country. A school I visited, Lycee Malalai, truly showed me the true spirit of Afghan girls. I was there for a talk by the founder of an NGO, JAHAN. At the end of it, the Principal addressed the school. Though I did not understand what she was saying, a girl next to me translated the speech. I was extremely surprised by the tone and passion of the principal and particularly how the Afghan girls who voluntarily sat there for the talk was responding to her. She spoke about the need for women to progress, and the impact of education in building them up into women of great calibre; to win the respect of the men; and to change the tide of gender perceptions in the country. The speech, I thought was suited for university students in gender-studies lectures. But here there were little girls of age 10 years listening to such speeches. It was exceptionally remarkable!

Beauty

Afghan Women and local tradition

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Asia Foundation

Women & Local Tradition: Burkha

v Perspective on the wearing of the burkah varies amongst the public on the following grounds; gender, location (rural vs. urban), education and regions

v More females, urban dwellers and people who have higher education think the burkah is UNNECCESSARY

v More people living in the eastern, south central and northern south-western regions feel the burkah is NECESSARY

v 52% of people thought the burkah was more related to local afghan traditions as opposed to Islam. 46% thought vice versa to this.

v More people from central Kabul and western regions thought the burkah was more related to tradition than Islam. Other regions were divided on this

Education

v 56% of people strongly agree that women should have equal opportunities to men in education

Women and Work

v 70% of people said women should be allowed to work outside of the home

v 28% of people were negative towards this

v Men and women answered this differently

v 58% of men said women should be allowed to work outside of home, whilst 82% of women said this

Politics: Voting

v 53% of people strongly agree that the new constitution says men and women have equal rights.

v 59% of people strongly agree that in elections, that everyone must vote for themselves and that a man CANNOT vote in place of a woman

v 56% of people said that women should decide ALONE when voting

v 25% of people said that men should ADVISE a woman when voting

v 19% of people said that women should decide themselves when voting but in CONSULTATION with men

v More women than men said that women should decide alone when voting

Political Participation

v More than 50% of people said that men and women should have equal opportunities to political leadership positions

v However more females than males believe this

v 27% of people said that mostly women should hold these positions

v 21% of people said that ONLY MEN should hold these positions ***Controversial due to significant amount of people

v People in the eastern and south-western regions think political leadership positions should be mostly for men

v 47% of people said it would not make a difference if they were represented by a male or female in the Provincial Council whilst 35% of people said a man was preferable

v A significant amount of people do not want to be represented by a woman in the District Development Assembly or Community development Assembly

v Most people are ok with being represented by a female in the National Assembly

Potential areas we should focus on:

v Islam’s view on the education of women

v The reality of Hijab & Burkah

v Can women work in Islam?

Note: there is quite a lot of information on the politics regarding women in the survey. Our current piece on political participation by one of our researchers, is fairly thorough- is there anywhere we could develop this area?

Summarised by Zeenat Islam, Marketing Officer for Femin-ijtihad

Wazhma Frogh for Women’s Rights

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Inside Islam, a woman’s roar

Wazhma Frogh, an Afghan, uses her religion to press for women’s
rights – and development agencies take note.

By Jill Carroll | Staff writer of The Christian Science Monitor

Just hours after Wazhma Frogh arrived in an isolated, conservative
district in northeastern Afghanistan in 2002, the local mullah was
preaching to his congregation to kill her. Ms. Frogh was meddling
with their women with her plan to start a literacy program, he told
the assembly.

As she walked past the mosque during noon prayers, his words caught
her ear. Shocked, she marched straight into the mosque. In a flowing
black chador that left her face uncovered, she strode past the male
worshipers and faced the mullah. Trembling inside, she challenged
him.

“Mullah, give me five minutes,” she recalls saying. “I will tell you
something, and after that if you want to say I am an infidel and I am
a threat to you, just kill me.”

She then rattled off five Koranic verses – in both Arabic and the
local Dari language – that extol the virtues of education, tolerance,
and not harming others. She criticized local practices of allowing
men to use Islam to justify beating their wives, betrothing young
girls, and denying women an education.

The room was silent. All eyes were on Frogh and the mullah. Then the
mullah rested his hand on her head.

“God bless you, my daughter,” he said.

With that, Frogh won permission to start the literacy program that
later helped women from Badakhshan Province participate in local
government and run for the national assembly.

Where rigid interpretations of Islam relegate women to second-class
status, Frogh uses rhetorical jujitsu to turn religious arguments on
their heads and win women’s rights. Her steely determination has
earned her attention in Washington.